Room Raiderz!
by blonde.mindblower
Summary: Sequel to My Own Sasuke. If u havent read it, THEN READ IT! Anywayz, the Akatsuki have a NEW plan to infiltrate Konoha...At their members expense...Parody of MTV's Room Raiders. 2nd in MTV parody series.
1. Chapter 1

-1**Okayz. So, this is da sequel I promised. It's VERY DeixIno becuz I wrote this in like…September, or August or something, and I was REALLY obsessed with Deidara, but now I'm ALL NejixIno. Like I said, I didn't change the pairings or anything, becuz dat would ruin the story. I don't like ItaxSaku or SasuxSaku either, but Im not changing anything. Disclaimer: Why would someone as young and as moronic as me, own Naruto?! Enjoy.**

_**Room Raiderz!**_

Deidara sighed. For some reason Leader called another pointless meeting. Well, what are you going to do?

Leader: Okay, bastards. Since the last infiltration attempt didn't work, we're going to come up with another plan.

Hidan raised his hand. Leader nodded.

Hidan: Okay, baka-sama. Here's a thought. Maybe the plan didn't work because you sent three of us to MTV to spy on Konoha by getting through that beep beep pink-haired beeeep. For all we know, she probably hasn't given Itachi a single beep moment to himself. What's your brilliant plan now?

Leader: Well, this just means we're calling MTV again. It is a _very _popular station among Konoha kunoichi, and they won't suspect a thing!

Deidara: Don't you think someone in Konoha has recognized Itachi right now, un?

Leader: Let me check!(does weird astral projection thingy and a rainbow-tized Itachi appears in the room)

Kisame: Itachi! OMG are you okay?!?

Itachi: I've got five minutes before pinkie will punch down the door.

Leader: Well, you seem fine, so apparently no one noticed you , huh?

Itachi: I'm far from fine at the moment. My blood in my arm doesn't flow freely, because the only time pinkie lets go of it is when I go to the bathroom.

Leader: Well, I'm sorry to hear that, but I don't care! Has anyone recognized you?

Itachi: Nope. Nobody. Which is amazing considering Kisame and I fought some jounin in their village a few years back.

Deidara: Wow. Konoha shinobi are amazingly stupid, un.

Kakazu: Hey, Itachi, did you get some?

Itachi: (glares at him and twitches) No, I did not. Although once I was amazingly close.

Kisame: No! Itachi, we'll save you!

Leader: Leave him…

Hidan: Here's a smart idea: kill her and run off.

Itachi: You think I haven't tried already?

Leader: Well, we'll leave you for now!

Itachi: But…(Sakura smashes through door)

Sakura: Itachi! What the flip do you think you're doing?!?!

Itachi: No! (Itachi's image fades into nothingness)

Tobi: Poor, poor Itachi-san. Too bad Tobi can't him feel better…

Everyone else: …

Kisame: Hey, Tobi, back off!

Tobi: Watch it! Tobi's a good boy!

Zetsu: Yes he is.

Leader: For the next infiltration attempt, we will also call up MTV…

Everyone else: (groan)

Leader: Hey! It's easy, and it's fun to watch you bastards do crazy shit.

Deidara: That's great, un.

Leader: Well, isn't someone here brimming with joy? Fine, with that smart-ass attitude, you're going!

Deidara: What, un?!?!

Sasori: Haha, sucker!

Leader: You too Mr. Pinochio-head

Sasori: Well, since I have no emotions, then all I can say is -beep-!

Leader: Yeah, you're an affectionate one.

Tobi: I will be a good boy and go!

Leader: Well, that's the spirit!(thinking: Sucker! That was too easy! I would've picked Kakazu to do it, but… nah.) Okay, this time the show is called Room Raiders. You'll figure out why soon enough.

Deidara: By, the name, it sounds obvious what's going to happen, hm?

Leader: Care to explain it, Mr. Know- It-All?

Deidara: No, un.

Leader: Yeah, thought so.

-In Konoha-

Sakura: (still holding on to Itachi's arm) Ino, since you don't have a guy, maybe you should go on MTV too! Look how happy I am!

Ino; What are you talking about? I'm going out with Neji.

Sakura: What?!?! Why didn't you tell me?!

Ino: I did, but you were too busy staring at Itachi to hear me. Uhh, Sakura, he's staring at you like he wants to kill you again!

Sakura: Oh? Well let's see how he feels after we bring out the castor oil!

Itachi: Pft, like that's gonna work on me.

Sakura: Hm, let's try this! (takes out a bag of marshmallows)

Itachi: You're going to threaten me with marshmallows? Are you out of your -beep-in-

mind?

Sakura: (shoves marshmallow in his mouth)

Itachi: No! It's… so… sweet! NO!

Ino: Yeah, I gotta go now

Sakura: Promise me you'll think about the show.

Ino: What's the point? I'm fine now. I really like Neji, so don't do anything stupid.

Sakura: We'll see about that…

-Few hours later-

Neji's walking home after his date with Ino. She had to leave a little early, because she was sleeping over at Temari's the very same night.

Neji: Geez, girls have sleepovers so much, it makes you wonder if they're plotting something. (pictures Ino and Temari in Nazi military suits looking at a map, and plotting out their next move and shudders) That's really something I didn't need to think of.

All of a sudden, he feels like he's being watched.

Neji: Byakugan!(looks around) Oh, it's just Sakura and that creepy boyfriend of hers.

Sakura: Hi Neji!! Have you met Itachi?

Neji: Er, no.

Sakura: Well, now you have! So how's things going with you and Ino?

Neji: That's really none of your business.

Sakura: Breaking up with her soon?

Neji: No, not at all…

Sakura: Well, you're gonna have to.

Neji: Because…?

Sakura: Listen, she needs a _real_ guy. Not some white-eyed weirdo who won't shut up about his precious "destiny."

Neji: …wow. You can't insult a guy to save your life. How pathetic. Anyways, you just want her to get a freaky boyfriend off of MTV like you did.

Sakura: And your point is?

Neji: That's depressing.

Sakura: Well, either you break up with her, or I'll sic Itachi-kun on you.

Neji: Yeah, I'm just gonna go now.

Sakura: Itaaaaaaaaaaaachi!

Itachi: What the hell do you want?

Sakura: Sic him!

Itachi: … or what?

Sakura: ( holds up bag of marshmallows)

Itachi: I hate you. Mangekyou Sharingan!

Neji: (trapped in creepy genjutsu world) Well, this makes no sense whatsoever.

Itachi: The torture begins now.

Neji repeatedly sees how his dad got killed in the genjutsu.

Neji: Fine! Fine! If it means that f-beep- much to you, I'll break up with her! Happy?

Sakura: Good boy. Neji, want a cookie?

Neji: You make a guy break up with his girlfriend, then you offer him a cookie? What kind of lunatic are you? OF COURSE I DON'T WANT A COOKIE!!!

Sakura: Of course you do! (gives him evil look)

Neji: Does it have to be chocolate chip?

Sakura: Yes.

Neji: Fine. Give me the stupid cookie.

Neji sighs and walks over to Temari's house. Ino and Temari open the door.

Temari: Geez, Ino, does you're boyfriend love you so much, that he decides to stalk you when you're sleeping over at my house?

Ino: You're just jealous Temari that Shikamaru hasn't made a move on you yet.

Temari: Aw, shut up! What do _you _want loverboy?

Ino: Temari! Do you mind?!?

Temari: OOOH. I get it. I'll get some more root beer.(walks off)

Neji: You have some _really _crazy friends.

Ino: Hey! Wait, what happened?

Neji: Sakura had her creepy boyfriend attack me, because I told her I wasn't going to break up with you, just so she could get you some loser off of MTV.

Ino: First of all, aaw, how sweet of you, and second, WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER!? She's been bugging ,me about that _all_ week.

Neji: So what are we going to do?

Ino: I'll do the stupid show, just to get her to shut up. I'll dump the guy, and we'll go back to the way it used to be! -

Neji: Well, it better work, because Sakura's gone insane, and I don't want her giving me any more cookies!

Ino: o.O What?!

Neji: Nevermind. See ya later.

Ino: Bye Neji-kun!

Temari: (comes back with root beer) So, how did it go?

Ino: Eh, Sakura's gone beyond the loco line, and wants me to get an MTV boyfriend, and threatened Neji with cookies until he agreed. We didn't really break up, but we're just keeping things low until this is all over.

Temari: What kind of guy gets threatened by _cookies_?

Ino: You know what? Neji likes particular foods, and he just happens to think chocolate chip cookies are too sweet for him. He likes ginger snaps better.

Temari: No comment. But, how can he _not _like chocolate chip? I mean, Gaara goes nuts if he sees any.

Gaara: OMG OMG OMG DID SOMEONE SAY COOKIE!?!?!?

Temari: No, Gaara, no go back to bed.

Gaara: But I can't sleep, remember?

Temari: Do you want me to send Kankerou up there to sing you a lullaby then?

Gaara: (turns Orochimaru pale) No! (runs upstairs)

Ino: Wow. He's even crazier than I am.

Temari: Let's just say Gaara is _unknown_.

Ino: No question about that.

-End of Chappie 1-

**Are you pplz ready for the next chappie? If not, then suck it up and read it anyway. These stories are short becuz of all the randomness…which is a fault on my part. I NEED reviews, cuz what can I say, I'm review-poor at the moment, but since My Own Sasuke got close to no hits…(sigh) then I comprendo. **


	2. Chapter 2

-1**Update happy! Just don't ask… I have nothing to do… so yeah. THIS chappie is going to be VERY DeixIno… but not too much, because of all the sarcasm. YAY SARCASM! Once I type Made(and get some more reviews) then I'll post it. I dunno how far I will actually go in this series…so stick around. It may be ENJOYING.**

_**-Get ready for it!-**_

-Next day-

Ino: Okay, Sakura. I'll do whatever happy show you want me to do, but after that, stay OUT of my personal life. Got that?

Sakura: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! Itachi-kun, you're going to have a new friend now!

Itachi: (thinking: I wonder which suckers Leader sent next.)

Ino: But if I don't like him, then don't force me or anything, all right?

Sakura; Yeah, sure, whatever. Anyways, we better hurry then!

Ino: Why?

Sakura: I already signed you up! They're filming the show today!

Ino: Well, that was considerate of you for not telling me.

Sakura: It was a surprise!

Ino: Yeah, I noticed.

-2 hours later-

Camera guy: (filming) And go!

Random guys from the show run into the Akatsuki lair and look for Tobi, Deidara, and Sasori. Tobi was doing everyone else's chores, which at the time, was repainting one side of the lair. He even had a complimentary Akatsuki maid's dress that Kakazu made for him.(He had to pay him 200 dollars, though. Kakazu's services aren't cheap). Deidara was in the official Akatsuki Jacuzzi drinking a martini from the official Akatsuki mini-bar.(geez, they really have it good over there) Sasori was updating the weaponry and poisons on his puppets, but somehow, got tied up with his own chakra strings, jumping around the room calling for Deidara to get him out. All three of them were a wee bit more than surprised at the unexpected visit. Tobi was the only one happy about it though. They were taken to a van with a big screen TV in the back. They sat in front of it cursing and wondering what was happening next. Then they saw two girls, one with blonde hair, and the other with pink, arguing. The pink-haired one smiled a sheepish grin, and pushed the blonde to the center of the camera view and ran off.

Sasori: Hey, weren't they on the last show we had to do? I remember the pink-haired one's name was Sakura, and the blonde one Ino. From my experience I'm guessing the blonde one was the normaler of the two.

Deidara: Wonder if she is the stalker type like her little friend.

Tobi: Wow! Tobi's never been stalked before!

Deidara: I don't doubt that, yeah.

Ino: Um, hey I'm Ino Yamanaka. I'm 15, and according to my strange friend and everyone else, I'll be raiding your rooms today.

Sakura: Tell them more about yourself!

Ino: No! Your face can!

Sakura: (runs up to where Ino is standing) Ino likes coffee, drawing, music, all animals except for monkeys, cows , chickens, and baboons, and is deathly afraid of old people and clowns. She also likes long romantic walks-

Ino: Okay! Woah there! Last part not true!

Sasori: She's afraid of old people? Hm, I wonder how she can survive in Konoha, then.

Ino: (pushes Sakura away) Ignore forehead-girl. Even though I really don't feel like doing so at the moment, let's see your rooms before forehead spazzes out again.

Ino walks until she comes across the Akatsuki lair.

Ino: Well, isn't this the cheeriest little place complete with a dead garden…

Tobi: Oops. Zetsu-sama is going to be mad at me.

Ino: Okay, let's get this over with.(opens door) Wow. You guys really live large here, huh?

In the room was a Jacuzzi, plasma screen, the works. Hidan and Kakazu were watching professional poker and making bets,

Ino: Um, hi, I'm supposed to raid Deidara, Sasori, and Tobi's rooms. Can you tell me where they are?

Hidan: They're not -beep-in- hard to miss. All of our doors are labeled because some orange-masked punk keeps forgetting which room is his!

Kakazu: Now you owe me a buck.

Ino: For…?

Kakazu: For our directions. You got a buck?

Ino: I only have 79 cents…

Kakazu: Money!(dives)

Ino: You're welcome…?(runs)

Deidara: I'm really starting to feel bad for her. Running into those two, hm…

Tobi: Ooooh! Senpai's in love!

Deidara: Katsu! Hm!

Tobi: Senpai, that hurt!

Deidara: It was meant to thickhead, un!

Sasori: Now, now. Let's take a deep breath and release our anger. I'm so glad I don't have any emotions!

Tobi: How could you be glad about not having emotions when you don't have emotions?

Sasori: Shut up and watch the TV!

Ino: Room 1. Sasori. Okay, here we go…

Sasori: No! I'm first!

Ino opens the door and looks inside.

Ino: Are you kidding me? This guy likes puppets? He's just like that moron Kankerou!

Sasori: How dare she say that about my puppets?

Tobi: Well, they are kind of stupid…

Sasori: If I had feelings, I'd be expressing intense anger right now, but I think killing you in your sleep sounds better,

Tobi: I'm up for the challenge!

Deidara: Whatever floats your boat, un.

Ino: Well, I guess I still have to look around. Oh look! A picture!

Sasori: Great. She found the picture of my mom and dad.

Ino: I'm guessing those are your parents. Mom's pretty, but the dad's complexion doesn't match his hair. Well, that's why they have hair dye I guess.

Deidara: Those are your parents?! Wait, why do you still have a picture of them? Aaw! Sasori-danna misses his mommy and daddy-kins, un!

Sasori: Deidara, shut up before I shove some Iron Sand up your butt.

Ino: This room is officially stupid. I do not want to see the rest of it!

Tobi: I don't think she'll pick you, Sasori-sama…

Sasori: …

Tobi: You should really read this self-help book Zetsu-san got me! It's worked wonders on me! Why not you?

Deidara: I don't think it helped at all, yeah…

Ino: Let's hope this room doesn't give me Chucky nightmares.

Deidara: Crap, what's she doing in front of my room, hm?

Tobi: Uh, she's going to go through your room senpai!

Deidara: I never got that memo, un!

Sasori: Idiot. Why did you think this show was called Room Raiders?

Deidara: For catchy purposes… or religious, hm.

Sasori: (smacks head) What's wrong with you, you moron?!

Tobi: I'm assuming many things.

Sasori: I wouldn't be talking if I was you. I can't even imagine what problems _you_ have!

Tobi: That wasn't very nice!

Sasori: --'

Deidara: No! I forgot that I buffed the floors! Yeah!

Ino: Ooh, the floors are _really_ clean… aah!(falls) Stupid floor…

Deidara: My bad, hm…

Ino: Oh look. Warning: Bastards, I buffed my floors. I feel so much positivity coming from this sign!(sarcasm)

Tobi: She's as sarcastic as you senpai!

Deidara: And your point is, hm…?

Ino: Woah. This room actually is pretty cool! I totally dig the whole artsy thing…

Deidara: Finally, someone who appreciates culture, yeah.

Tobi: Hey, I appreciate culture too! Just the other day I watched Songebob…

Deidara: Spongebob is not culture! It's a show about some deformed blob that lives in a fruit with his pet parasite, un!

Sasori: Hey, it's not that bad…

Deidara: --'

Ino: Sweet, I'm guessing you're an artist. No, duh, no, you're a plumber! That would explain all the sculptures!(sarcasm)

Tobi: She must be really dumb to think you're a plumber.

Deidara: Ever heard of sarcasm, Tobi, hm?

Tobi: Sar-saya-whata?

Deidara: Nevermind, yeah.

Ino: Are you like a wannabe terrorist? I see many pictures of explosions. And.. sketchbooks… designs for new sculptures, maybe?

Deidara: Book for coming up with new jutsus, yeah.

Ino: Well, at least, this room wasn't as bad as the last one… okay, moving on!

Tobi: The best for last!

Sasori: That's only what the public _want_ you to think, Tobi.

Ino: (reading) The great and incredible Tobi(not reading) Wow, egotistical, are we?

Tobi: It's self -motivation!

Deidara: Whatever floats your boat, un…wait, déjà vu, yeah.

Ino: … I don't feel safe. This whole room is in the dumbest shade of orange I've ever seen in my entire life!

Tobi: Hey! It's my favorite color? Don't diss it!

Ino: Wow. You must be a loser to be obsessed with orange. Wow. What's this button on the wall?

Tobi: NO! Don't press that!

Deidara: Ooh, Tobi's got a secret!(secret door opens to reveal hidden room filled with a library of self help books, and psyciatrist chairs. Little oompa-loompas are the librarians)

Ino: … NO COMMENT! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!!!(runs away)

Deidara: We did not need to see that, hm.

Tobi: NOOO!!! POR QUE?!?!?!(Spanish:WHY?!?!)

Ino; Yeah, the winner is obvious. Whatever. I'm out. That last room scared me out of my mind.

Sasori: I heard oompa-loompas are really hard to come by these days! Wherever did you get them?

Tobi: That's for me to know, and for you to lose sleep over!

Deidara: Ooh, Tobi actually came up with an insult! Good job, un!

Tobi: (big chibi eyes shining) You really think so?

Deidara: No, un!

Tobi: (does weird anime fall)(man comes in van)

Man: Okay, you guys, now you are going to raid Ino's room!

Tobi: (blushes) This is going to be the first time I've been in a _girl's_ room!

Man: Oh shut up. Anywayz, there's her house.Try to refrain from prevertedness, okay?

Deidara: The only one who would do something like that is the idiot in the orange mask, hm.

Tobi: There's someone else in the van?

Sasori: No, Tobi. He meant you.

Tobi: Oh. Okay.

Everyone else: …

Man: Now shoo! I have to return this van to Orochimaru.(pedophile, white van… get it?)

Sasori: I don't even want to know.

Deidara: Can I wear something more than my trunks, hm?

Man: Unless you find a rag on the street. Now get out and leave!(kicks them out)

Tobi: Senpai, have you've been working out? You have six-pack abs!

Deidara: No comment, hm.

Tobi: Would her room be where the white door is covered in purple and says Ino's Room?

Sasori: No, Tobi, it's the one that smells like lemons, with the shower in it down the hall.(sarcasm)

Tobi: Really? Weird room…(walks off)

Deidara: Well, let's just see what's in the room for the heck of it, hm.(they walk in)

Wow. She even has a freakin color scheme. Purple, blue, green… and here I was thinking this was going to be a magic fairy princess room.

Sasori: Hmph. I don't see any puppets, or even dolls! Just guitars, art shizz, and all other stuff Deidara would care about more than me.

Deidara: Hey, maybe this chick isn't so bad…

Sasori: Whatever.

Ino: What are you guys doing in my room?

Deidara: The guy in the white van told us to come here, un.

Ino: (thinking very strange thought) WTF?!? A white van?!?

Sasori: Never mind. --'

Ino: Um, where's the third guy?

Tobi: That room is lemon-scented!-

Ino: Okay, a)Why are you in a maids dress, and b) why did you go in the bathroom?!?

Tobi: I have the right to remain silent in court of law.

Ino: o.O Wow. Well, okay, you're weird. Okay, and why are you shirtless?!?!(blushes)

Deidara: The guy kidnapped me while I was in the Jacuzzi, hm!

Ino: You mean the one in the white van?

Deidara: Yeah, un.

Ino: This is really not sounding right. Okay, room one, I'm sorry but no, because I saw the movie Chucky, and I hate puppets and dolls.

Sasori: Yeah, whatever. Hasta la vista pinheads!

Ino: … the second room was artsy-terrorist, and I'm still recovering from the 3rd room. Okay, who's the second room?

Deidara: Me, yeah.

Ino: Well, you win. Yay. (sarcasm)

Tobi: (sniff) I feel so dejected.

Ino: So what, now?

Man: Now you two have to go on a date!

Ino: Oh god.

Deidara: Hm, I don't mind, yeah.

Sakura: (runs up and hugs Ino) I told you you would be happy once you found a guy!

Ino: Whatever.

Itachi; Oh, so it's Deidara this time. Well, you and that blonde girl do look a little alike…

Deidara and Ino: WTF?!?!?

Sakura: You two are going to be so happy together! Come on Itachi!

Itachi: NOOOO!!! (gets dragged away)

Deidara and Ino: o.O

Deidara: You're not going to do that to me, are you, un?

Ino: Eh, I don't really care. See ya!

Deidara: Aren't we supposed to go on a date, hm?

Ino: Pft, I don't care. Do whatever you want.

Deidara: Why, you have a boyfriend or something already, un?

Ino: Pinkie forced me onto the show. Besides, I'm not exactly ugly.

Deidara: True enough, yeah(checks her out)

Ino: Perv. Well, bye, artsy-blonde person. If you get really, really bored and are willing to buy me coffee, then look me up, okay?

Deidara: You can count on it, yeah.

Ino: (walks away thinking: Well, at least he's blonde.)

Deidara: (thinking: This is going to be fun, un.)

-The End-

**This story is waaaaaaaaaay longer than My Own Sasuke, and I condensed it into two LONG chappies. I couldn't figure out where to cut it, but whatever. It's done. Made might not be up here for a while. Try not to die before then. And remember… REVIEWS ARE APPRECIATED/NEEDED! Thnx!**


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